Historic, Hideous Sweep in Toronto

I think it’s safe to say that in this moment, as we celebrate the Fourth of July, the Yankees are the worst team in MLB. You think I’m kidding? Don’t look at the season record, just look at what has happened the last three weeks. They’re the worst team in MLB. Way to go fellas. Second place now, probably third place by the end of the weekend, and who knows how much farther this team is capable of falling? Read this if you dare. Lets get to it. 

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Some of you may remember London Fletcher, a long-time NFL linebacker who played five of his 16 seasons for the Bills from 2002 through 2006. Most of you also remember that his tenure came in the early stages of Buffalo’s unfathomable 17-year playoff drought, so Fletcher was around a lot of bad football which often led him, as a team leader, to paint lipstick on pigs after so many losses.

Before Aaron Boone made it an art form to find positives in the darkest moments, there was Fletcher who became famous among the Buffalo media corps for statements like this: “Well, outside of that 80-yard touchdown run, we played pretty well against the run.” Or, “Hey, they scored 30 points in the second quarter, but they didn’t score in the other three.”

That’s why, in the spirit of Fletcher, I fully expected Boone on Wednesday - after the Jays scored seven runs in the first inning on the way to an 11-9 victory - to say something like, “I’m proud of my guys. The Blue Jays outscored us 7-0 in the first inning, but we outscored them 9-4 in the last eight.”

He didn’t say that, but he did say, “Obviously it’s never fun losing three in a row, especially to a division opponent, but our guys competed their asses off and battled.”

Meanwhile, the other guy who never finds fault in anything the Yankees do, Mr. Happy Pills himself, captain Aaron Judge, said, “If we play better, we’ll put ourselves in a better position. But it’s not concerning. Not concerned about what’s going on around us.”

So, did the Yankees play better on Thursday? No. They had a chance to salvage at least one game which would have enabled them to remain in first place, but of course, they failed, which was a remarkable redundancy across these four embarrassing, mortifying, sickening games.

The god damn Toronto Blue Jays swept the Yankees, and it was historic. If you can believe this, here’s the proof regarding how pathetic these four games were: This was the 28th all-time four-game series played between these teams up in Toronto, and this is the first time the Blue Jays have ever pulled off a sweep. Oh, and their 36 total runs were the most ever by the Blue Jays in a series against the Yankees. The most ever!

Digest that, if you can.

Isn’t it great that Judge isn’t concerned about what’s going on as the Yankees have now lost 14 of their last 20 games? And folks, this is no ordinary 14 losses in 20 games.

Here’s another beauty, courtesy of Katie Sharp on X who specializes in producing crazy database search numbers: This is the first time since 1990 that the Yankees have had any 20-game stretch in a season in which they had this hat trick of hell: Lost at least 14 games, left 159 or more runners on base, and scored 79 or fewer runs.

Nah, nothing to worry about Judgey. All good here.

You want more from X? The Yankees have now had a 6-14 stretch in four consecutive seasons, and these are the only other teams to do that: The Rockies, Marlins, Pirates, Angels, Athletics, Rangers and Nationals. Look at the company they’re keeping here. Other than the Rangers, these are pretty much the six worst franchises in MLB.

“We think we’re really good,” Boone said. “We’ve obviously had a tough stretch here, but we’ll get through it. We respect all the teams in this division. We know how tough it is. I always say, you’ve got to pack a lunch when you come play in this division. It’s not surprising that it’s really competitive.”

The Yankees should be packing lunches, breakfasts and dinners when they play the AL East because they’re now 10-16 against the Jays, Rays, Red Sox and Orioles.

“Like we always say, it’s a long season, and we’re going to play Yankee baseball like we’re supposed to,” said Will Warren, the man responsible for the 7-0 first-inning deficit on Wednesday.

Well, I don’t know what Warren thinks Yankees baseball is, but I would argue that Yankees baseball is what we saw in this series against the Jays because up in the land that Canadians say is the great white north, things all went south for the team from the Bronx.

July 2: Blue Jays 11, Yankees 9

➤ Wasn’t it great that the Yankees put us through this? I mean, when it was 7-0 with one out in the first, and 8-0 after three innings, we all chalked up another loss and most of us moved on to Netflix or Prime or HBO. Or, maybe to a bar to drink yourself into a stupor. But of course, the Yankees had to come all the way back to tie the game at 9-9 and make you think they were about to turn their sagging season around, only to rip our intestines out by choking it away in the bottom of the eighth. And so you know, I told my son when they tied it and didn’t take the lead that they were going to find a way to lose it. Naturally, I was right. God, I hate this team lately.

➤ Warren was horrendous in that first inning as he allowed seven runs on six hits and two walks. There was a two-run double by Alejandro Kirk, a three-run homer by someone named Addison Barger, and a two-run double by the dude who looks like a substitute English teacher, Davis Schneider. All that came before Warren could even record a second out. And then the Blue Jays made it 8-0 in the third when someone named Will Wagner doubled and scored on a single by Andres Gimenez who came into Tuesday’s game batting .200 and in the next two had five hits and four RBI with four runs scored.

➤ Through four innings Blue Jays starter Jose Berrios was dominant and he was on his way to an easy victory, but then he completely cratered in a crazy fifth when the Yankees scored six times to get back into it. They had five straight hits including RBI singles by DJ LeMahieu and Ben Rice, an RBI double by Judge and then a three-run homer by Giancarlo Stanton, his first of the season in his 13th game.

➤ Cody Bellinger’s RBI groundout made it 8-7 in the sixth, and in the seventh the Yankees had a chance to get even but that inning died the way so many innings have died this season - with Anthony Volpe choking, this time with a soul-crushing double play. And when Schneider hit his second home run of the game, a bomb off Tim Hill, it felt like the Blue Jays had regained their footing.

➤ Ah, but the Yankees weren’t done screwing with our emotions. Rice worked an eighth-inning walk and rather than intentionally walk Judge for the fourth time in the series to this point, Blue Jays manager John Schneider decided to pitch to him. Big mistake as Judge came through with a monstrous 440-foot game-tying homer. And just like his monstrous game-tying homer off Boston’s Garrett Crochet a few weeks ago, it meant nothing in the end because his teammates proceeded to piss away what had the potential to be a great victory.

➤ Devin Williams came on to pitch the eighth and he walked Yankee tormentor George Springer, and after he stole second, Boone walked Vlad Guerrero intentionally. I understood the decision, but in the end it backfired. That’s because unlike the Yankees, the Blue Jays know how to play the game. Both of those guys advanced a base on a deep fly to center by Kirk, and then Springer scored the winning run when Williams threw a terrible pitch that Rice could not block, partially because his blocking fundamentals were invisible. And Guerrero scored the insurance run on a single by this Barger kid who I had never heard of before this week.

What they said in Wednesday’s clubhouse

• Boone on Stanton finally doing something useful: “I feel like he’s looked pretty good so far and close. When he’s gotten that swing off, it hasn’t been elevated. It’s been a smoked ball on the ground or just missing a pitch. So I feel like the timing has been pretty good overall.”

• Williams on the wild pitch: “I’ve got to make a better pitch there. It wasn’t the easiest one to block for Ben, so I’ve got to make a better pitch.”

• Warren: “It’s nice seeing them put up nine runs after I gave up seven in the first like that. That shows the fight; that shows the camaraderie of this team.”

July 3: Blue Jays 8, Yankees 5

➤ I’m not even gonna bother recapping much of this because quite frankly, who gives a shit what happened at this point?

➤ The big news is that this was the night for Clarke Schmidt’s annual injury that will probably put him down for two months. Right forearm tightness which is never good. He’ll be getting an MRI Friday, and we’ll hold our breath but you know damn well he’s going on the IL and will be there a while. It would be shocking if that doesn’t happen. And it’s a shame because he has pitched really well and this team cannot afford to lose him because there’s no one left to replace him. They’re screwed.

➤ Springer. My God. This royal pain in the ass, who had already built up two careers worth of hate in Yankee land from his days with the Astros, added a third career’s worth in this series alone. He went 8-for-14 with four homers and 11 RBI. Seriously, are you kidding me? Two homers in this game, the first off Schmidt in the third that gave the Jays a 3-1 lead, the second off Luke Weaver in the eighth that made it 8-5.

➤ You remember Weaver, who used to be good? He now sucks. Springer’s final dagger was a two-run moon shot off Weaver who had one job - keep it a one-run game going into the ninth and at least giving the Yankees a miniscule chance of rallying. Total fail, and once they were down three, it might as well have been 30.

➤ The only positive from this game was Jasson Dominguez continuing to come along as he had the second four-hit game of his young career. You know what that means in the warped mind of Boone - Dominguez will be sitting Friday. Overall the Yankees had 12 hits, but guess when they didn’t hit? Yes, with runners in scoring position. Another 12 men left on base thanks to a 2-for-14 slopfest meaning they finished 9-for-50 in the series, which is .180. Meanwhile, the Jays hit .405 with RISP.

What they said in Thursday’s clubhouse

• Schmidt: “I mean, anytime you’re getting an MRI on your forearm or whatever the body part is, you’re not feeling happy about it. I’m praying everything’s going to be clean and minor, but we’ll see what happens.”

• Boone: “It sucks when you get your ass kicked in a division-rival series, on the road. But we’re ready-made for this and we will get through this. We obviously know we need to play better. We need to do better. … We will stick together through this and embrace the adversity of it. This will make us stronger as we navigate through the season. I know nobody likes hearing that, but that’s what this is.”

• Judge: “You can’t panic. That’s not going to help the situation. We got work to do. It’s a baseball season. … We got to focus on a big series coming up against the Mets. That’s all we can do is keep focusing on the present and the game we got in front of us.”

The second half of the Subway Series is up next, if anyone cares. Both of these teams have been among the worst in MLB the last three weeks or so, but unlike the Yankees, the Mets have started to show some life. After a 3-14 death spiral which knocked them out of first place in the NL East, the Mets won their last two games against the Brewers Wednesday and Thursday. Naturally, they did so right on time to face the Yankees.

Here are some of the Mets top players to watch:

➤ RF Juan Soto: Since the Yankees last saw their old friend, he has become Juan Soto again. In his last 30 games he’s hitting .320 and has 11 homers and 21 RBI. Yeah, I fully expect him to kill the Yankees this weekend.

➤ 1B Pete Alonso: He started great, hit a soft spot, and now has picked it back up again and he has 18 homers and 67 RBI with a team-high .909 OPS.

➤ SS Francisco Lindor: Like Alonso, he’s had a rough last 30 games hitting .229 with a .292 on-base but he went 4-for-8 in the last two wins over the Brewers.

➤ LF Brandon Nimmo: His 17 homers are tied with Lindor and trail only Soto (20) and Alonso (18).

➤ RP Edwin Diaz: He’s one of the best closers in the game and has a 1.85 ERA and 0.910 WHIP with 18 saves in 19 chances.

The pitching matchups are scheduled to be:

• Friday, 3:10, YES: Marcus Stroman (8.16 ERA) vs. TBD, and this is because the Mets have even more pitching injuries than the Yankees.

• Saturday, 4:10, FS1: Carlos Rodon (2.95) vs. Frankie Montas (6.00), the former Yankee waste of a trade acquisition who is making just his third start of the year.

• Sunday, 1:40, YES: Max Fried (2.13) vs. TBD.